Hamilton’s Lowland

Hamiltons_LowlandRegion: Lowland
Price:  $
Class:  70% Bean Bag, 30% Parking Lot / Alley
Rating: 2 / 5

Best consumed in a conversion van's beanbag loveseat,
parked next to some railroad tracks within sight of
undulating hills and/or a local high school.


Pros, Cons and Neutralities

+: Very cheap
+: Drink however you want – irresponsibly or otherwise
+: Super sweet art – painting of a hillside, water and a fucking castle
+: Includes smack talk – “..castles and abbeys ravaged during the long wars with ‘the Auld Enemy'” (England)
: Twist cap
N: 80 proof


Culling of the Copy

  • Color: Pale golden colour.
  • Nose: Floral, typically lowland, summer flowers with some sweet-ish malt underneath.
  • Palate: Delicate, soft malt. Fine and light rather than fruit (sic) and weighty.
  • Finish: Elegant, gentle and long-ish finish.

G.L.O.: The palate is completely backwards.  It is slightly fruity and only a little weighty.  They really love the “ish”s.


The Word(s) on the Street

adjectives: workhorse, anticlimactic, relatively gritty, lacking subtlety / finesse, unapparent wood characteristics, hammer-like front

“This is all front with no middle or finish.”

“Scotch for when you’re dead inside.”

“This smells like my belly button.” (Dave after drinking some Glenlivet 15 and Glen Ness)

“See Auchentoshan minus any delicacy and refinement.”

“Subtle decline to Auchentoshan with a disproportionate cost differential.”

“Like prison sex – it blows its load and yields no finish.  For you.  Specifically.”


One thought on “Hamilton’s Lowland

  1. well, this is a scotch website, so i think the “fuck england” sentiment applies across the board. but the “auld enemy” is badass.

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